11/13/10 An Epiphany


An Epiphany

I have spent the past two years despising my son’s father, because I feel that he is deliberately ignoring my son and failing to contribute to his upbringing (physically and financially) just to get revenge against me.  It is appalling that someone would use a child for payback purposes, but it really has been the story of my life (first with my father, second with my step-father) and therefore, a never-ending challenge.  However, I am a firm believer in “everything happens for a reason”, and “that which does not kill you, makes you stronger”.  In the end, I feel that I have been the benefactor of wisdom, strength and independence.

With regards to my son’s father, I’ve come to the conclusion that, again, I am the benefactor of a priceless treasure, my son.  His father will, forever, miss out on all the wonderful moments in his son’s life (and there are so many).

I accept the fact that everyone is not meant to be together, but the child is ours no matter what, and therefore, deserving of the best parents can offer.  Real parents are those who battle out their differences without involving or attacking the child.  Is my son missing out on a crucial element of his life?  I think he is, and that makes me work even harder to provide and guide.  Ultimately, when all is said and done, I will be able to say, “I did my best”.

There will be no more waisted time despising someone who is triggering his own negative energy.  I will continue to bask in the glory of the wonderful moments of being a parent.  I am truly blessed.

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